Friday, July 18, 2008

Dealing with Criticism

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh no! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh no! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."

You know what this is. It's Criticism. We've all experienced it. Nobody wants to be criticized yet it is so easy for us to criticize others.

Sometimes criticism is justified, sometimes it is not. But none of us like it. No one enjoys being told they are doing something wrong.

It is always an unpleasant experience. Yet criticism is necessary.

Guy Woods has written, "Inasmuch as criticism is inevitable, we must, in order to be happy, acquire an ability to rise above it. He who is overly sensitive to the opinions of others is at the mercy of every gossiper of his acquaintance. Some folks purr like a kitten when stroked by praise; but when criticized, they become resentful, discouraged, and quit. It is highly essential that everyone discover a technique for dealing with the adverse opinions of others, and use it regularly and effectively."

Albert Einstein wasn't always acclaimed for his scientific breakthroughs, notes physicist Stephen Hawking in his book A Brief History of Time (Bantam Books). "His theories came under attack; an anti-Einstein organization was even set up." But Einstein remained unconcerned about these critics, Hawking writes. "When a book was published entitled 100 Authors Against Einstein, he retorted, 'If I were wrong, then one would have been enough!"

How do you deal with criticism?”

Here are a couple of ideas that may help you when you are criticized.

1. Your number of critics is directly proportional to the quality of your performance.

The world is full of critics and so expect criticism. The more productive you are the more criticism you will receive. If you want to play it safe, then say nothing, do nothing, accomplish nothing, dream nothing and you will be a successful nothing. Then there is nothing to criticize. But then your critics will say “You are a nothing.” Then that turns out to be another criticism. Who are the people who are receiving the blunt of criticism? They are the ones out there with their sleeves rolled up busy producing. And the beautiful thing about this is that the productive people are happy despite what their critics say.

2. Let the legitimate criticisms teach and transform you.

Some criticisms serve a useful purpose. Learn from it. Do not be too onion skinned. You will smell. Recognize that some criticisms are certainly deserved. Even when critics are unkind always remember this. They may be right!

Even when they exaggerate your failures, there may still be some truth in what they say. So look at the situation honestly and ask these questions: Is it true? If so, how can I overcome the condition that caused it? How can I avoid future criticism of the same kind?

If I made a mistake then it should serve as a learning mistake. But if I failed to learn from it then I will be committing a stupid mistake. This will confirm what the critics say. Scripture says: “The ear that hears the reproof of life will abide among the wise. He who disdains instructions despises his own soul, but he who heeds reproof gets understanding.”

3. Eat ice cream. Chill. Move on and forget it.

And when the criticisms are unfair and unjust, just chill and prove your critics wrong by your consistency in doing things right and doing the right things. This may not shut up their mouths but it sure can diminish their credibility. The more you attempt to answer criticism, the worse the criticism becomes. For one who is not interested in the truth, the more you explain the more material your critics can use against you.

4. Be a good critic yourself.

And if you need to criticize someone, remember “THE FOUR-TO-ONE RULE:” FOR EVERY criticism you make of someone's job performance, make sure you give the person four compliments.

Do not belittle people. To belittle is to be little.

Somebody says: “Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. Then when you do criticize that person, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.” Just kidding, but you know what I mean.


Source: Francis Kong

More thanks to Mr. Francis Kong for giving me permission to post his writings in my blog. Godbless Sir!!!